Sep
19
2008
4

Perspective

86I have just realised that it was three years ago yesterday that I left the Newfrontiers achurch I had been part of for over five years. Back then I felt very damaged and broken, still hurt and tender from the things that had (and had not in some cases) been said. I wondered then how I could move on and whether I would regain any sense of joy that I had previously.

But things change over time. The process has been a learning experience both for me and my family and I am quite sure that if I hadn’t gone through that valley experience then I would be a different person today. I am more tolerant, more cynical (or realistic depending on how you look at it!) and I am much less conservative than I was. The questioning had started a long time before I left, but it hasn’t really stopped. I am still full of questions, but these days I am far more content to live with not having any answers, and just to experience the process, however uncomfortable it might be. Things are good.

I still marvel at the fact that my life looks different now, but I wouldn’t change it. Thank you to all who have shared in this journey… your support, love and friendship certainly makes it all worthwhile 🙂

Written by Anna Williams in: Uncategorized | Tags: , , , ,
Jul
15
2008
10

Sometimes it’s hard to be a woman

Er... what? Dave Warnock helpfully linked to Becki’s blog which made some commentary on the ‘women’s seminars’ at Together with a Mission, the Newfrontiers Conference. The woman who writes this blog comments that…

“I think that’s what modern feminism teaches, that we can have it all – that by giving women loads of life choices, society liberates them. I actually think the reverse is true. A society that tells women they can do everything forces them to strive to be the best mother, wife, employee, and housewife that she can be, which leaves women stressed and trapped. I think I’d got myself into this mindset.”

What Becki is commenting on above is not feminism… it is putting women into a box that has been created for them by men (NB. please note I am specifically talking about men in these sorts of churches). It is confining and squeezing women to a role that men think is appropriate and suitable for their gender. That is not feminism.

My favourite quote about feminism is by Rebecca West, and it says,

“I myself have never been able to find out precisely what feminism is: I only know that people call me a feminist whenever I express sentiments that differentiate me from a doormat, or a prostitute.”

Dave’s comment on Becki’s musings are,

“In my experience Christian feminist thinking is actually freeing for women and men. It sets us free from stereotypes that may not fit and free from rigid expectations, free to be the people that we are created to be. Free to work out our relationships in ways that are appropriate for our personalities, preferences and abilities.”

The Pieta My experience of Becki’s version of “Newfrontiers feminism” is that I was made to feel inferior. I was made to feel inferior by the fact that I was not married by the age of 21 and I had not popped out a quiver full of children by the time I was 25.

I was made to feel substandard by the fact that I was (and am to this day) a questioning, curious, open-minded WOMAN who was truly passionate about the minorities and the broken-hearted; those for whom the church does not necessarily have an answer. Those who are rejected by the church on the basis of their sexuality, gender and identity of romantic choice of partner.

Instead of freeing women up to be creative and dynamic people these churches squeeze women into a ‘gender-appropriate’ role, limiting them to the expectations of the leadership, and not necessarily releasing them into fulfillment of who God has called them to be.

The reality is that many of the women I read about in the bible were not limited by their gender; they were truly counter-cultural. I think of people like Queen Esther, Rahab, Mary the mother of Jesus, Mary Magdalene, Ruth, Deborah, Lydia, the woman at the well and Abigail. I could go on, but these were all women who shaped biblical history, who in one way or the other made choices that would mark them down as women of great faith.

I don’t see a God who limited his future into one shaped like a man, only choosing men to do his works. Instead I see a God who truly delighted in the women in the Bible… who saw them and their destinies before the world began and, I believe, actively made choices to choose women to fulfill his story. So, it is this God that I choose to lay my hope in.

Written by Anna Williams in: Uncategorized | Tags: , , , , ,
Jul
11
2008
8

Newfrontiers and women

This week Newfrontiers is hosting their Leadership Conference in Brighton entitled “Together on a Mission”. They have a variety of different speakers including a load of Newfrontiers leaders, but also they have Mark Driscoll from Mars Hill Church in Seattle.

Adrian Warnock is blogging live from the event and summarising some of the main speakers and their messages. Yesterday he blogged about Mark Driscoll’s talk entitled Missional Movements. Whilst I have no problem with quite a lot of what was said (or what was reported by Adrian at least) there is one things that really stood out for me in this blog entry. It is this statement…

“Young men, you need to step up…One prayer is for a bunch of 20 year old guys with hope who will plant churches and preach the gospel with hope. Be looking at all times for men in their 20’s. They will be arrogant, foolish, impetuous, critical, disorganized, and they will be perfect for the task God has for them!”

Now, in many ways I have no problem with this sentiment. I agree that the church needs younger leaders and fresh eyes to interpret and move movements and organisations forward. What I really object to however is this focus on men all the time. In my experience of being in several Newfrontiers churches this is one of the things that is focused on all the time. Men, men, men! Women barely got a look in and certainly for me being a part of one of these churches I always felt that the only way to be validated in any sort of ministry was through marriage . Then you would be freed up and supported in ministry.

This is all very well and good if you happen to be married, but there were plenty of young women who were passionate about God and really desired to serve him and the local church, and yet they were unable to be innovative, forward looking and creative in the ways they chose to serve God because of the barrier of their gender.

As a young(ish) single woman with no potential love interest on the horizon where does that leave me? Does it mean that I have to sit around waiting and searching for Mr. Right, or do I get on with living the life that I currently have and serving God in the places he has called me to? For me, this focus on men and Newfrontiers’ denegration of women was one of the reasons I chose to leave. Whilst Newfrontiers may be critical of the Anglican movement, I have found this to be a more freeing environment as a single woman, something which has come as a complete surprise for me. It seems to me that whereas Newfrontiers churches view the ‘established church’ as being stuck in their ways, it seems to me that often they can be more forward-thinking than they are given credit for.

Written by Anna Williams in: Uncategorized | Tags: , , , ,

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