The end of 2013
Well, as has become my end of year tradition it is time to write this year’s review.
This year has, without a doubt, been bittersweet, but let’s start right at the beginning…
January dawned with a brand new little baby to look after and get used to. After all the waiting it really was the most amazing, if exhausting experience but it was truly wonderful. We were still living at Mum and Dad’s then and it was lovely to have their support and I think they enjoyed it too. We even had a visit from The Mister’s parents to meet their new grandson.
In February we moved into our lovely little bungalow which had been lovingly decorated by The Mister, my parents and as many other people we could rope in as possible. This house is wonderful! It is small but perfectly formed (a bit like me?!) but it has been such a nice place to live, and to escape to. We appreciate so much all the help that we have had to get it in order.
In March we had loads of snow – enough to make the island grind to a halt. Justifiably for a change as we had several inches of the white stuff on a small island which is just not equipped to deal with it! It was brilliant, we went out walking and generally enjoyed being able to play about in the snow. The kids loved it!
April saw a houseful of people as my best friends and The Mister’s best friends all descended for about a week over Easter to help us celebrate The Little Mister’s Thanksgiving. Having so many people in the house was marginally stressful at times but it was also brilliant! The worst thing about living in Guernsey is that is is hard to keep up with people at times (thank goodness for Facebook and other such tools!) but when we do get together it is like nothing has changed!
In June we made the most of glorious weather and spent time on the beach before I went back to work and then we had another visit from the in-laws and this time they brought Uncle David with them to meet his new nephew.
In July I went back to work which was generally disappointing and we also had my cousin’s daughter’s wedding which was great fun. It was a beautifully hot day which was fortunate as it was in a field.
In August we had a brilliant camping holiday in Wales with our friends followed by a trip to Greenbelt. This time we wimped out of camping and stayed in the Premier Inn. We had a great time, but it was very different doing it with a small baby in tow!
In September our world came crashing down and life changed forever. Mum and Dad went on holiday to Greece and on 25 September my wonderful Mum died, very suddenly and unexpectedly, of a heart attack. To say we are devastated is an understatement and I almost feel that I should finish the blog post here, but I shan’t.
October saw us go through Mum’s burial and Celebration service to which over 400 people came. This picture on the left was taken of the three grandchildren at Mum’s Celebration Service.
We also took a family trip to Jersey zoo and we tried desperately to try and work out what life looks like without Mum in it. November kind of all blurs in together and I am still trying to work out how we managed to get through those very immediate, painful days.
I guess we did it by sticking together, crying a lot and eating a lot of cake. In a crisis our family seem to do cake quite a lot!
December was The Little Mister’s birthday. A day I had been looking forward to so much, but a day that was so painful at times without Mum there. He had a wonderful day and we had a little family party with my cousin’s daughter Clara who was one year old a few days after Edward. Christmas came and went in a haze of food and family. My sister and her family and we all went to stay down at Dad’s house. It was brilliant to be together, but once again that gaping hole was so profound.
So, we have reached the end of the year. A year of two halves you could say. The first two thirds were amazing and the last third was awful.
We miss Mum so much. She was the glue that held us all together and now we are having to try to re-piece our lives and work out how things work a bit differently. Dad is doing well, but everything seems so wrong, and we wish life was different. I would have given every present under that tree this year to have Mum back. Sadly life doesn’t work like that. The one thing I can say for sure is that family has become even more important than ever. In particular I have rediscovered what an amazing woman my sister is and I think she and I are a pretty rock hard team.
Dad is amazing and yet we recognise that this is hardest of all for him. We would love to make it OK but we can’t even come close. However our relationships are stronger and better than ever. Without The Mister I would have really struggled. He has been my rock and I am grateful every day for him. The Little Mister has given me something to smile about every day. He has kept me going when it has felt especially sad.
We truly appreciate all the love and support that we have had from friends and family over the last few months. We definitely could not have managed without you all!!
So, we enter 2014, hoping and praying that things will be better. That this year we will find a new rhythm and hope and somehow, our lives will once again find some joy.
